Forgiving Yourself

                                                           
Most of us have struggled with self forgiveness throughout our life. The intellectual part of you knows that there is nothing you can do about the past but the emotional part of you still wants to kick yourself for whatever misdeeds you feel you have done.
Generally you can forgive others of pretty much everything they have done to you in life, (forgetting takes a little bit longer) but when it comes to forgiving yourself, you are a very severe judge, more than anyone else could ever be. As for forgetting, well those things that you would like to be able to forget, seem to stick with you in your mind forever.

The most unfortunate part of not being able to forgive yourself is, that it gets in the way of your being able to live the best life you can. You can either be miserable for the rest of your life, and wallow in your misery, or you can give yourself permission to heal. This permission has to be on-going and the release does not happen overnight because your self-judgment and self condemnation runs deep. Forgiveness is something you have to decide to do for yourself. Nobody else can make that decision for you. When you don’t forgive, it’s like you are blinding yourself with glasses which distort everything that you see, and you want everyone else around you to look with that same distorted vision. Forgiveness is taking off the glasses, seeing with unclouded vision, a vision which allows you to go forward in confidence. It is lightening up because you see things more clearly, more as they really are, and being able to enjoy your life again. It has nothing to do with worthiness, yours or anyone else’s. All are worthy.
You must choose to love yourself, quietly and simply, accepting yourself for who and what you are, no more excuses, no more guilt trips, no more treading carefully, manipulating yourself and others. If you cannot love yourself, how can you ever truly feel the love from someone else, how can you heal? Guilt is something you use to cover up everything negative and bad. When you feel guilty, you commit the ultimate betrayal of abandoning yourself. Yes, it is appropriate to be sorry for the things we have done, but you can also learn to let it go once you have acknowledged your sorrow. If you do not you will never be able to heal yourself.

Part of being able to forgive yourself, is understanding that you don’t have to be punished. The idea of sin and punishment come from the old set of beliefs handed down to us through distant cellular memory and our early socialization. But you were born innocent and came to this dimension in order to learn, to experiment, and to discover, who you are in this dimension of energy expression. It was not ‘natural” that you be forced to “toe the line”. It was is not ordained that you be a “good girl/boy” by human force of will.

You chose to live by these rules until such time that you saw another way of you own freewill. You made mistakes in learning these human rules and you learned how to play the game and deny your own heart knowing.  Now you know, and so it is time to drop all the pretenses, the judgments of right or wrong, and truly do your own thing unfettered by the old rules based on lies about worth and about being perfect. The mistakes you may have made in the past are about choices you made and the resultant learning from them. All have lead to you being who you are NOW. You take responsibility for all the actions that you have ever engaged in. All are a blessing, all have led you to now. To deny your choices and  to punish yourself any longer for making them is not the action of someone who is love incarnate, and is becoming totally conscious of all that they are.

Give yourself a break and permission to let go of the pain that your misdeeds have caused you. Be more realistic about yourself, and the expectations you hold for yourself. Why should you be harder on yourself than you are on others? Ask yourself if you would be able to forgive someone else had they done the same thing, and then forgive yourself. Let it go. You cannot change the past, it’s gone. You can only change the future, and you do that by learning from your mistakes, and by taking what good you can from the past and moving forward leaving the things you know you cannot change behind.

And why is it that you have to forgive? Because every time you doubt your inner prompting, your sense of what is true for you, what is affirming of your presence in the moment, your past judgments of you are reemerging. The unkind lies that you were taught when you were young, that you do not have infinite power to create your experience. So forgiveness is about undoing the self judgments of powerlessness, which are in themselves acts of unlovingness. You forgive because you have been living in the illusion of an unkind lie. A lie that said you are not a creator. A lie that says you are born in darkness and in the shadow of a beast. You are not of light and you must be taught of all the horrors you and your human family have created and to beware of your power to create more evil. You must be afraid of yourself, your ego, your selfishness, and your potential for hate. That anything you do has the potential to harm and that even if you have intended only to please that it will back fire on you because people will suck you dry for they are just as dangerous, as self interested, hateful, and untrustworthy as you could be.

These are the lies of centuries that cause you to be so doubtful about yourself. To hold beliefs that you should beware of yourself. That cause you to be so unforgiving for the tiniest choice you make that brings you disharmony. These are the lies of centuries that have now come home to the surface to be examined by everyone.

So the trick is that when you doubt, when you fall, when you feel pain, be it emotional, mental, or physical, take the beware feeling and turn it into, ‘be aware’. Become aware of what is happening and take a little time to remind yourself of the truth of who you are. Step into the higher version of yourself.

Remind yourself that you are love incarnate. You came here for the expressed purpose of an adventure. An adventure into a life where you would go into a dream of shadows to experience separateness and isolation. That you would take on various dramas, losing yourself in them. That you would gradually wake from the dream you created and realize that you created it all for the experience of it. That it was all done in love because that is the nature of All That Is. That there were no errors, no failures because every part of it was your choice and every part of everybody’s experience was, is and will be their choice. So waking up, ending the game is about totally accepting what was. There is no longer any need for recriminations. You played the game totally and you are free to the extent you honour the game you and every single player has committed themselves to. No matter what has happened, no matter what shadows you have explored. When you do this it becomes easy to forgive yourself, no matter what you feel you have done. You played a game so well you got lost in the act. Congratulations, take this Oscar, bravo! You have really earned it.

You now know that you have the power to create anything. And you have come to Earth at this particular time, where there is so much excitement, so much chaos, and so much change, and so much potential to create something new and magnificent. You have arrived here and now to bring your great capacity to love. You have come to show how to release the past, the old beliefs (unkind lies) through full and total forgiveness, and therefore love for what you have experience. You have come to release humanity from the fetters of these beliefs and to explore and build a New Earth Dream. One based on love, togetherness and abundance, one free of all pain and disharmony.  You are the Ones you have been waiting for.
You have not waisted one iota of your time, everything has been in order, you have timed it perfectly. You have perfectly timed your take off into the great love that you are, into the gifts you have to offer, and into the most beautiful relationship you could possibly imagine. Your love affair with Gaia.

So forgiveness is such a simple process. It is merely about clearing up the reminants of the old memories of the lies you have told yourself. It is all over. You have already moved well beyond the old truths. You have already switched channel. It is simply a matter of fine tuning and even that you do not have to concern yourself about because in switching channel you, have moved from your head navigator to your heart navigator. It does not require of you to have a set plan, nor to be especially prepared. Your path, your journey will unfold perfectly step by step.

You have nothing to be guilty of. You are perfectly placed, with perfect timing, and having had all the experience you needed to have, they are all now “under your belt”. Forgiving all and becoming forever grateful will be your passport to moving on. Forgiving and being grateful will open all the doors to your expanded Self. Forgiving and being grateful will allow your love to flow more freely as you gently drop into the flow of the New Energies of liquid Love and Wisdom. Forgiveness and gratitude will powerfully and naturally lead you into all that you desire and could hope for, easily, and without having to strive for it any longer. Life, opportunity, joy, and unity with all life will flow through you. It will leave behind that stifling need to search for something missing. It will show itself in every move you make, in every situation you find yourself in, at every turn in your experience.

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